


Before

by sarcasticfirefighter



Category: Doctor Strange (2016), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Canon Disabled Character, Compare and Contrast, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, LLF Comment Project, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Stephen Strange-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-05
Updated: 2020-10-05
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:35:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26836045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarcasticfirefighter/pseuds/sarcasticfirefighter
Summary: Sometimes Stephen gets lost in his head and needs a little pep talk. Is it, let's say,strangethat it comes from a relic? Doubtful. The Cloak of Levitation is a sentient being, after all.
Relationships: Stephen Strange & Cloak of Levitation
Comments: 4
Kudos: 27





	Before

**Author's Note:**

  * For [neutronstardust13](https://archiveofourown.org/users/neutronstardust13/gifts).



> A little gift just because I can. <3

A slight move.

Stephen’s finger moves. And there it is, maybe, maybe he can do it like…

(“Before,” his mind chants).

It twitches.

He sighs and quickly shakes his head. Ridiculous. He shouldn’t have let himself hope, even for a short moment.

It's easier to ignore it. Falling—even unconsciously—for an illusion of a normal day is more than painful.

Stephen recognises that pain is an old friend, but in all honesty even sustaining thousands of deaths by Dormammu didn't beat the ache of his loss. In fact, nothing comes close— _no, wrong_.

Ebony Maw’s microsurgical needles. The alien knew what it was doing.

Stephen takes a shaky breath and closes his eyes for a second.

The Cloak seems to sense its sorcerer’s mood and gently caresses his cheek. Stephen smiles faintly.

“It’s alright,” he susurrates tiredly.

The relic doesn’t agree with him. It stubbornly covers his trembling hands, so he can’t punish himself anymore. The sorcerer doesn’t voice it, but he is grateful for that small yet considerate gesture.

(“A piece of fabric is more empathetic than you ever were as a doctor,” his brain mercilessly says).

Stephen still wakes up screaming. The tormenting dreams don’t cease, and the Cloak of Levitation had to intervene more than once. Thankfully, he did put a spell to silence the bedroom (otherwise the jaded man would be heard). He doesn’t know what is worse; the possibility of the whole street hearing him or Wong witnessing it. There's some shame to it that he is unable to stave off. Maybe that prideful part of Doctor Stephen Strange, the renowned neurosurgeon of the Metro-General Hospital is still there.

He wonders, sometimes. Would it pan out differently if he were to use the Time Stone to prevent his accident?

Would he go back to being an arrogant asshole, even with all his knowledge of the Mystic Arts? Would he continue using magic, despite having the full use and intact fine motor skills of his hands? Would he go back to neurosurgery and the operating theatre? Would he reconcile with Christine, salvaging their relationship? If so, would that be out of a sheer loneliness? Or would he just clutch at straws, while bearing the guilt of a world left behind?

He doesn’t know.

One thing clear enough is that he is not the same person he was before the crash. He has changed but some old parts remained.

He sighs again. Mind made, he finally tosses a bit of the duvet away and sits. The Cloak hovers nearby, waiting.

In all fairness, protecting the Multiverse is easy. However, living with the consequences while simultaneously navigating through one’s difficulties - not so much.

Strange groans and gets up from the bed. He forgoes the painstaking process of manually putting on his sorcerer’s robes. Instead, he makes a few motions with his hands, instantly donning his usual attire.

(“The scrubs were navy, too,” the unhelpful brain adds).

The ever faithful Cloak of Levitation follows, making itself comfortable on the man’s shoulders. It firmly squeezes his right arm in yet another comforting gesture. This time Stephen sends it a warm look. As he directs himself to the Sanctum’s library, his strides get more confident.

Another day has started and he resumes his duties.

If anything, persistence is something Stephen Strange excels at.

**Author's Note:**

> This story is part of the [LLF Comment Project](https://longlivefeedback.tumblr.com/llfcommentproject), which was created to improve communication between readers and authors. 
> 
> I invite and appreciate feedback, including:  
> 
> 
> * Short comments  
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> * Long comments  
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> * Questions  
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> * Constructive criticism  
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> * "kudos", "<3" or any other emote as extra kudos  
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> * Reader-reader interaction (no hate & shaming please)
> 
> If there's a need, here's a tool to help write a review: [LLF Comment Builder](https://longlivefeedback.tumblr.com/post/170952243543/now-presenting-the-llf-comment-builder-beta).
> 
> I reply to comments. Sometimes that may be very quick or take a while but all comments eventually get a response. If you don’t want one, no matter the reason (e.g. you're shy, not up to starting a conversation), feel free to sign your comment with "whisper" and I will appreciate it greatly but not respond.


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